The Hardest Hour in Recent Memory

At 6 p.m. on Friday, May 13, 2011, results of the California bar exam were posted on the state bar website. I'd taken the February exam, felt I did very poorly, and had been anxious and worried about it since the moment I walked out of the examination room. (This picture was taken the night before the exam started. You can tell it was not after the first day of the exam since I had an actual smile on my face instead of a look of utter panic).

My anxiety mounted as May 13 approached. The morning that results were posted, I vowed to keep myself busy and mentally occupied so that I did not have time to think about results. Instead, I ended up getting nothing done, and driving up and down the same street three times before giving up and going home. The hour before results were posted, I sat at my screen and refreshed the state bar website every single minute, watching the little countdown "sixteen minutes until results are posted." My sister-in-law, Sue, counted down with me and kept me relatively sane for that hour. Greg was stuck in court and could not be with me at the pivotal moment, when I went online and look at my results. I don't even remember exactly what they said, but because they were an entire sentence long; i.e., "this person's name appears on the examination pass list" I was sure that I did not pass- I figured if I had passed, it would read "PASSED." Only after re-reading the sentence several times did I realize I had passed, and even then I did not believe it until Sue logged onto the website as me and agreed that I had, in fact, passed.

Whew. What a relief to have that done and over with!! Now, on to bigger and better things...like getting married!