A friend recently forwarded the following thoughts which blew my mind: he's obviously not a single mom but he's so totally on-track in so many areas of how I view myself. I wanted to share his thoughts, so here goes. Comment and tell me what you think!
"One of the most welcome surprises I've encountered since entering the "dating scene" has been the surprise phenomenon of the recently liberated mom who "started young" and "finished early" ... and how graciously she has often emerged from the parenting process both physically and personally. Having emptied her nest in her mid- to late 30s, she exhibits scarcely noticeable signs of wear, compared with women who undertook parenting at a later, perhaps more "conventional" age; she has, indeed, turned a daunting challenge into a bit of an advantage, re-entering "me time" mode while she's still youthful and energetic enough to truly enjoy it ... and at age when other women have not yet even begun to forsake it.Despite the likelihood of having faced stigma and anxiety at the outset, "Early Mom" often seems far less "drained" by motherhood than older moms; her personality is often more positive and upbeat. She can take pride in having measured up to a challenge that others might have immaturely shirked, and she's wiser for the effort ... wise enough to appreciate what others her age still take for granted; counterintuitively, she often seems to have raised her kids with fewer "issues" than have parents who started out with better-arrayed resources. In fact, she has benefited from being closer in age to her kids; this reduced the generational gap between them, perhaps helping her to relate to them more easily during their teens, while they, in turn, kept her in touch with contemporary culture and humor. As a result, she's still hip to current styles and trends, while being wise enough to see through the fads of fashion; often, she has coalesced a maturely personal sense of style long before becoming too tired or indifferent to change. In many ways, Early Mom's early start, which might have initially presented her with a daunting, unsought challenge,. ultimately looks a bit like a blessing in disguise, having rewarded her with the wisdom, experience, and sense of accomplishment that enables her to properly appreciate the youth she still enjoys. Others have wasted it foolishly, perhaps damaging themselves in the process ... but it's her day in the sun now, and she's *feeling it*. :-)It bothers me that Early Mom might still feel embarrassed about her early start, knowing that people can be hastily judgmental and make many false assumptions; on the contrary, I want to HIGH-FIVE her, for *earning my respect* by having chosen, under perhaps challenging circumstances, to (wo)man up and handle the heaviest responsibility a person can take on. She could have dodged that challenge, but she did the right thing, and she knows it; she has that self-respect; and that is something that is undeniably *hot* in the eyes of a guy who is looking for an equal, rather than a mere accessory... Ultimately, she occupies a rare "sweet spot" of qualities that make a woman someone I want to be around. She tends to defy expectations and have a unique perspective; she is a woman who "gets it", who is over the silly stuff and past the jitters; she still appreciates pure, unadulterated "fun", but does it with tact and discretion; she's a woman who can handle serious talk, but is still young enough not to take *herself* too seriously.And, in the happiest circumstance, she's a gal who hasn't yet thrown in the towel in terms of taking care of herself; she's still "got it", and she knows it ... she senses that she's in her prime *now*, and she's *feeling it* ... and she'd be right. Big ups to Early Mom ... for being the silver lining among the puffy cloud formations of the over-35 dating scene. You go, Ms. Girl ..."
